Stress happens when you interpret events as causing you unnerving discomfort. Obviously such a feeling makes you want to stop it from repeating itself.
Observe this BIG clue about how to end stress: stop trying to eliminate stress. You cannot accomplish when you try. Try allows for the possibility of not succeeding.
So right off the bat, remove the word try from your vocabulary to allow yourself the true opportunity to succeed in eliminating the stress.
Realize that whatever you focus on expands in your life. What do you do when you work at removing something, like stress, from your life? Even if you work really hard at something what you really do is magnify it in your life. Your attention feeds it.
How can you eliminate something by helping it to grow bigger and more pronounced?
Obviously you can’t. So the way to eliminate stress is not by trying, not by working at it and certainly not by thinking about it all the time—something you call worry.
Most people think that when you worry about something you are actually doing something about it. Are you kidding? How does worry serve any purpose at all except to raise your stress level, create anxiety and cause physical symptoms in you as your subconscious mind puts you through the scenario that you are imagining!
Your subconscious cannot tell when you really live an event versus when you imagine an event happening.
Ah – now take that last sentence as your clue. What?
You want to eliminate the stress you experience. You know your subconscious mind makes real anything you imagine. Therefore, if you create a scenario in which you do not experience stress (even though, in the past you did feel very stressed in this same circumstance) then you succeed in removing the stress from that very event.
One powerful way to make that happen is to picture yourself entering the situation you want to change. And you can only change yourself. So no one else will act differently (well, probably not).
So now you see the picture of yourself in that same formerly stressful event only this time you act differently. You see the entire situation in a new light, from a different perspective. You cannot even figure out why you used to feel stressed at such times.
You can watch yourself, as though you are watching a movie – the first time. But next time, and every time after that, actually step into the situation and look out through your eyes. Hear what you will hear through your ears. Feel what you feel and touch and smell what you will feel, touch and smell.
Remember that your subconscious is making all of this real for you.
Victory. Your subconscious mind will become convinced that, in that situation, you act this new way. And the next time that situation comes up you remember to consciously step into this new way of behaving and you will no longer feel stressed – even though nothing about the situation itself changed.
All that changed is how you feel about it and the actions you take that let you feel differently.
I am Ali Bierman. What do I DO and why do I do it? I teach you how to live in happiness now. Nothing in your life will work perfectly or permanently until you love yourself first. When you accomplish that end then you live in happiness.
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