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Stress and Divorced 40 Something Women

Many divorced 40-something women experience stress in a number of areas. It seems like a mid-life awakening nudges them to move out of the boxes in which they lived, seemingly in safety, all their lives.

If you fall into that category then I have some great news for you.

You see, you never were really comfortable at all. You just did what you knew rather than chance jumping into the unknown. Now you can free yourself from that false sense of security and finally forge a new path, specific to you, that leads you where you want to go.

You may feel uncertain about where you want to go. Actually you do know. You only lack knowing how to get in touch with that information that already lives inside you.

How about taking a brief view of your current circumstances?

Since you chose to read this title you already feel stress in your life. Maybe you are recently divorced after a long marriage. Ii is not uncommon, today, for couples to get divorced after more than thirty years of marriage.

Even if the separation was a mutual agreement and an amicable split you still have feelings to deal with. Those feelings may be in your awareness or maybe you buried them to prevent any further hurt for the time being.

Perhaps this is the first time you are living on your own. As freeing as that sounds it is also limiting. When you need a hug or some help in the middle of the night – you have you to count on to make it through. Well, maybe you have a pet and phone number you can call. The thing is this situation is new for you.

Of course being in a marriage can be more lonely than living on your own. So maybe you already adjusted to being alone. Know what I mean?

Your whole social life may be in a bit of an upheaval. Friends who you enjoyed as a couple may feel uncomfortable being with just you. So there is yet another adjustment to make.

OR you can see that experience as an adventure into new territory and a chance to know new people.

Now that you get to prepare food just for you, you get to do what you want. Ah, and you get to show you how important you are by preparing nice meals – just for you.

It surprises me how many women do not bother, as they say, to prepare luscious fun and elegant dishes just for themselves. Who is worth more in your life than you?

If the response was you do not need or deserve it then you definitely have a lot of stress around self care, self worth and self image.

Add health, if you are moving through the change of life and a new desire to connect with your spiritual side add both to the mix.

Well, no wonder you feel so much stress. But what if you viewed each point as a new beginning into a world of surprises? Whether those surprises feel good or otherwise – well that choice is yours alone to make.

Stress is a choice you make by deciding what feels good and what feels overwhelming and scary.

About the Author Ali

I am Ali Bierman. What do I DO and why do I do it? I teach you how to live in happiness now. Nothing in your life will work perfectly or permanently until you love yourself first. When you accomplish that end then you live in happiness.

  • jay gillespie says:

    sounds like my 43 year old wife of 22 years that broke up our home, broke the heart of her husband and 3 teen age daughters. You go girl it's all about you!!!

    • alitlc says:

      Thanks for sharing, Jay. Sounds like a lot of pain for all of you. The fact you read the article and left a comment tells me how strong you are AND that you are committed to healing for yourself and for your kids.
      I have no idea what happened for your wife. Consider she is on her path in life.
      Do what you need to do to take care of your feelings and heal.Release the hurt. And assist your daughters in doing the same.
      No, it is not easy and it is possible to move forward with your lives without the deep emotional attachments to the events. Let me know if you want help with that.

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