Power of the Spirit – part 1

One of the most impactful experiences of my life came in the care-taking of my mother during the last ten months of her life. In addition to the devastating physical deterioration caused by cancer, my mom’s mental functioning was like that of a two-year old. She was unable to do anything for herself. She thought I was her mother. She clung to me and was uncomfortable when I was out of her sight.
When my mom had the mini-stroke that took away her ability to live on her own, I was just completing a three-year struggle to rebuild my own life following a brain injury. There I was, 49 years old, just ready to take on living my own life again for the first time when I became my mother’s parent around-the-clock.
I felt cheated and very angry. I resented having to put my life on hold yet again–indefinitely. (I did not know she had cancer at the time. To me, this was the ultimate unwilling sacrifice that could last many years.)
I threw a major pity party for myself. I made the situation all about me and how my mom’s illness affected me. No matter how I looked at the situation, all I saw were unfair circumstances coupled with cruel timing.
I received a priceless gift when I heard someone say, “It is never about you. It is always about the other person.” While the words came from a salesman teaching how to make sales, the message instantly changed my world.
I thought about what it must be like for my mom, this amazing woman who had run all three of her boss’ businesses and single-handedly raise my brother and me at a time when women did not work outside the home. In that moment, and for the rest of her life, I felt only love, honor, respect, and never-ending gratitude.